The one thing the Greeks have mastered is their ability to fat jab people constantly all the while maintaining a straight face. Our adventures in Athens and Santorini were often lined with beautiful clothing with me often inspecting them. They never once failed to point out that they had "bigger sizes" or that the clothes were "stretchy" or had "elastic". Now I am not in any denial here knowing where the fatness lies but that is no way to sell your shit. I swear if I heard one more time that they had bigger sizes I would grab my belly and pull out my dads old stand by: bought and paid for and just walk away, what a bunch of skinny ass hats.
So not only have the Greeks mastered the fat jabs we can also thank them apparently for democracy and theatre. A little history lesson from my travels on Greece taught me that Ancient Greece specifically Athens is much older than Ancient Rome (well Rome the power house) and developed a lot of things that are still in use today, on top of the aforementioned democracy and theatre but apparently it is in Athens the reason behind the marathon. Apparently the Athenian soldiers defeated the Persians in a battle and to avoid the potential of surrendering to the Persians maneuvering to the Port for battle one solider ran the 26.2 miles after a long battle to send the news to the troops within the city that they had won. The solider died of exhaustion but with his last dying breath he was able to say victory (in Greek of course) to avoid the surrender. All this resulting in the marathon run as you know it, the name coming from the place of Marathon to city center. Clearly they were too busy creating things like democracy and theatre when they could have seriously used an invention like smoke signals.
So Greek mythology has always been an interest of mine always trying to find our more about the myths, the gods and all the mere mortals that all went with the legends. Now there is also the fact that I am die hard Disney so while we were walking around Athens all that was going through my mind was the soundtrack of Hercules (Disney version) which got louder when entering the temple of Zeus. Europe is known for its extravagant cathedrals, churches and basilicas so it was nice to go where we can take a break and visit temples. For those who don't know ancient Greeks believed that if you were to give offerings to the gods that they would help you. So around Athens there are a couple of temples still up all dedicated to a different god. Each temple similar but also different in the tiny details according to Greek mythology you were to forget a God you would be punished. That is where most myths come from one God being upset because they were being ignored and would punish people. I wish that was life right now, I would punish anyone who forgot to offer me cake. 
Athens on the side of beggars, annoying men selling shit was slightly more subdued. Where there weren't men selling stupid selfie sticks there were children on the train playing the accordion. This was hard for me cause they have no issues invading your personal space making it impossible for me to keep a straight face. This seemed to make them try harder leaving me almost laughing saying no. Apparently in awkward situations I've developed a laughing reaction adding to the ever present bitch face. Not only are there awkward children but also old ladies with roses. Their trick is to give you a "free" Rose and when you do decide to take it they demand money from you. We witnessed a poor man who had to almost fight off this old lady as she was shoving the rose literally at the guys neck. The sad part wasn't the man trying to avoid the lady or the lady trying to force this man to take the Rose but the fact that the man had to be saved by none other than his wife. My travel partner chose a different tactic he decided to jump up at the last minute when the rose was being presented causing the rose to fall to the ground making a huge commotion and with the final result of the lady calling him crazy down the street. Again I resorted to laughter to such an awkward situation trying to distance myself between me and "the crazy man".
It was so great to see a city with ruins the dated before Christ and to have a city full of people so proud of their beginnings that it sucked to leave Athens. From Athens we went to Santorini. A beautiful island with houses built into the Cliffside sailboats sailing on the Mediterranean Sea and no commercialism anywhere in sight. The island is composed of different communities scattered and a bus system that is so sporadic that you would be lucky to catch a bus within five hours. We managed to pick the very best time to go to the island with little to no people around. We went to a beach that is normally crowded with chairs and people and we were one of the few there, oia which is said to have the best sunset in the world had only 10 tourists that we could count (during the day). Because I like to torture myself apparently we decided that it was necessary to Rent-A-Car, if there is ever a bad moment for backseat driving it is driving along the cliff in a foreign country in a smart car. The sad little smart car was definitely put through its paces with me at the wheel and my travel partner at my side. My beautiful Red jeep Loretta would've made the cliffside her bitch. There are moments where you would be driving along the cliff and it would look as though your car was going to right over the edge, I am surprised the Smart car still has a floor considering my travel partner was definitely trying to put his foot down to stop us Flintstone style. The obvious and most simple solution to all of it would just be my travel partner getting a license. There is nothing like saying do you know how to drive to end an argument so maybe you can hold off a little bit longer. 
The island was pretty much closed down for the season all hopes of making good money off a tourist gone with the last hot summer days. Although it was a good +21 on the one-day you were lucky to encounter any open shops or restaurants. Considering that were broke and can't afford restaurant food or luxurious clothes this didn't phase me too much. Going when we did we were able to see the island for what it was a beautiful place along the wide-open sea without the gimmicks that usually get when visiting a place this beautiful. I've seen pictures where the island is wall-to-wall people how do you get to enjoy a place like that when for the most part you're seeing the back of peoples heads trying to get a good view. We did a day trip to a volcano and hot springs. Being a northern Canadian you hear Hot Springs and you picture yourself waiting into the liard Hot Springs apparently Hot Springs in Greece means jumping off a boat and swimming to brown water that is colder than the Bluewater you left behind. To add insult to injury your swimming in salt water so it tastes disgusting and you're trying to awkwardly swim with your mouth out of the water although that doesn't provide any kind of efficiency. Seeing as my travel partner doesn't know how to swim I took this venture solo. We had plans of him wading in the shallow area while I went for a swim but that all changed when we learned that you had jump off the boat into water 10 metres deep. I don't think his mom would have liked me making her swimming illiterate son jump off a boat into the water for "the experience of it". So in I went and it tasted awful and was no where near warm.
Santorini was a constant uphill exercise, full of stairs, hills, strategically avoiding donkey shit, and trying not to die going up the steepest hill climbs. Every minute there was an adventure even if people still managed to get their fat jabs in. It is definitely a place for couples or even for singles looking to couple up, it is romantic in every way an island can be romantic. Between the white houses topped with blue roofs, manicured beaches, sunsets where the sun meets the sea, hell they even managed to make the donkey rides look like a romantic adventure. Santorini is a must see. It is a lot different from the island we hail from. 
We are currently in Barcelona where the beauty is not in nature but in the architecture. Our first day here being a whopping +21 it appears our summer has not quite ended. I know my friends and family at home might not like to hear this but we have experienced a 6 month long summer and are ready for some winter. We still have Madrid and Portugal so we shall see if we will ever get to cool down.
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